Do you sometimes become conscious of putting blocks in the way of what the universe is trying to give you?
This morning, I woke at 4am, which is normal for me, as I go to bed very early and use the early morning for productivity and personal development time. As it was a Sunday I allowed myself up to 45 minutes of meditation – this feels like a lot when there is a busy family life and a full-time job.
In the end I only needed 30 minutes before naturally `waking up`. I take off my watch and put it on my lap so I can have a sense of how much time passed during the meditation. If I decide to allocate a particular amount of time, my brain will usually allow me to `resurface` within that timeframe.
Nothing miraculous happened, but I was conscious of physiological changes – it did feel like my brain waves were slowing down. But I was on the verge of `nodding off“ (falling asleep) by the end, so I stopped. Winter is coming in England, and I was in the dark with a candle, and blankets over me, in a rocking chair (I`ve stopped using the cushion on the floor as my legs seem to stiffen up and I get pins and needles or a dead leg!). Perhaps this was too relaxing a set-up!
I then continued into my conscious connected breath pattern (30/60/90, with breath holds on the exhale of around 30/70/90 seconds each round), then the free Soma Breath guided session `Into The Light`, which lasts just over 20 minutes, and involves breathing to rhythmic and melodic music, guided by the voice of Niraj, the founder. This also involves breath holding on the exhale as well as the inhale.
Putting all this together was really powerful.
But I did experience background feelings of guilt, anxiety, and fear. Do I deserve to indulge myself in this way? Shouldn`t I be focusing on other priorities?
Altogether the session must have taken around 80 minutes. It was really enjoyable. But it made me conscious of a kind of block I may be putting up to receiving.
Are there areas of your life that trigger emotional reactions such as this? What does it reveal about what is going on for you?
What are your strategies for dealing with them?